Hindsight

I was born
a Daddy's
girl
payment in kind
for the son he wanted
and would not have
till much later when
he no longer wanted
to be anybody's father

When my Daddy left
because he had discovered
that being Daddy took
too much out of him
I cried 'til I was sick.

When he told me
years later that
leaving was just
what Daddys do
I could not cry
because I had no
more tears left.

And even though
I have not seen
my Daddy in
years because
he couldn't wouldn't
be anything like a Daddy
couldn't wouldn't be
bothered to pay any
respect to the dead mother
of his children because it
was all too much...even now,

I am still Daddy's girl
the girl he raised me
to be smart unafraid
the equal of any man
in strength and bravery
knowing deep in my
bones that men
even Daddys
can not be relied on
ever.